Saturday, January 15, 2011

#46 (2-16): The Gamesters of Triskelion

THE PLOT

Kirk, Chekov, and Uhura prepare to beam down to an automated communications station to do a routine check of the station's systems. Just before beam-out, they suddenly vanish. Not transporter vanished, but sudden and obvious jump-cut to them no longer being there vanished! As Spock attempts to find some trace of the three missing officers, Kirk and his companions find themselves on a planet known as Triskelion. The three have been taken to this planet to be trained as gladiators, to fight for the entertainment of the mysterious "Providers" for the rest of their lives!


CHARACTERS

Capt. Beefcake: Kirk's exhibitionist streak has been kept under tight control for much of the second season - likely a response to Shatner visibly packing on a few pounds over the course of the season. Per Memory Alpha, the production team stepped in by midseason and got Shatner to put himself on a diet. The diet took, and a slimmed-down Kirk gets to spend a fair amount of the episode running around with his shirt off again, all while tricked out in what looks suspiciously like bondage gear, complete with a "Collar of Obedience."

Kirk encourages rebellion against the Providers by his usual method: Identify the most attractive available female, and then teach her "What... is... kiss." We get treated to a lot of Kirk's hilariously gymnastic fighting style. Apparently, the somersault has a major place in mixed martial arts of the future. Kidding aside, both Kirk and Shatner get a genuinely pretty good scene near the end, in which he wheels and deals with The Providers in order to gamble for his crew's freedom.

Mr. Spock: Methodically searches for the only possible course to follow in attempting to get Kirk and the others back. He selects a course of action with a slim chance of success, on the grounds that it is the only one available... which does not stop him from having to endure endless scenes of Scott and McCoy questioning his decision and insisting that they should go back and search through the space dust around their initial position.

Uhura: If there's any doubt as to how much television has changed over the past 40-odd years, take a look at the scene in which Uhura is subjected to a rape attempt. She has been "selected" for breeding, which a "drill thrall" attempts to force upon her. The scene is genuinely disturbing, as Kirk stands by helplessly while Uhura struggles with her attacker. Even more disturbing is the way it's treated afterward. It isn't. This scene exists for a fade to commercial, with no consequences (emotional or otherwise) after. At the very least, Nichelle Nichols gets to display her considerable acting abilities in this scene, but having an attempted rape thrown in simply as a "dramatic sting" does leave a bad taste in my mouth.

Chekov: Gets to comedically deal with the advances of his large female drill thrall, whom he fears might be "selected" for him. Other than some strained comedy opposite her, he really doesn't get much to do, as per usual.

Hot Alien Space Babe of the Week: Angelique Pettyjohn is Shahna, Kirk's drill thrall. Being Kirk's, she is of course a statuesque model. She gets to deliver lines such as, "What... is... kiss," show herself to be a fast learner by kissing Kirk, writhe around in her bondage gear when her Collar of Obedience gets activated, and fight unconvincingly a few times. She requests to go with Kirk at the end, but Kirk dodges that bullet... er, thinks of her emotional development and insists she stay to learn about life. Then he gets out of that region of space at roughly Warp Factor 12, and tells Scotty he doesn't give a damn if the engines sprout wings and dance a jig, as long as he gets as far away as possible.

Villains of the Week: The writers. Oh, all right. Joseph Ruskin is moderately effective as Galt, the master thrall. His physical presence alone is effective, and his voice (presumably electronically treated) helps to make him a more unsettling figure than an episode this ridiculous deserves. The Providers themselves are less impressive, though I suppose there is something to be said for an episode whose resolution involves William Shatner emoting to a few lumps of Play-doh.


THOUGHTS

Likely the most outright stupid episode of the entire series. If The Gamesters of Triskelion has any value at all, it is comedic. It's impossible not to giggle while watching, with the low-rent bondage gear outfits, the bizarrely-choreographed fight scenes, and the rampant overacting by Shatner (and DeForest Kelly and James Doohan in the Enterprise scenes). Everything about this episode screams "crap," and the actors seem to be aware of this - which at least means that they're in on the joke.

This kind of episode can have good "cheese" value. Unfortunately, The Gamesters of Triskelion squanders this chance by being... well, boring. Once the episode's premise is set up, there is virtually nothing for the script to do except kill time until Kirk defies, then faces, the Providers. This makes the middle 25 minutes almost interminable.  Kirk and his comrades repeat their situation back to themselves multiple times, while Kirk tries to encourage Shahna's independence by repeating variations of the same scene with her multiple times. If you're going to make a simple-minded action episode, at least embrace that and put lots of simple-minded action in it!

The Enterprise scenes are even worse. Much worse, in fact. Every time we cut back to the Enterprise bridge, we are treated to Spock, McCoy, and Scotty having the same argument, sometimes with pretty much the same dialogue. Leonard Nimoy at least attempts to bring his game to bear, but DeForest Kelly and James Doohan seem clearly bored by the script and have no compunction about overacting heavily, probably to keep themselves amused.

I'm struggling to find much good to say about this episode. Other than inspiring some amusing send-ups in animated media, this is a poor episode that isn't even pacey enough to be "so bad it's good." I can think of a couple of Next Generation episodes that are worse than this, and there may be an Enterprise episode or two that give it a run for its money. But this is pretty bad stuff.


Rating: 1/10.


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2 comments:

  1. You're right that it's pretty bad. But there was one thing I enjoyed about it. In "The Gallileo Seven," Spock is written quite badly, and he has no idea of what to do when his subordinates give him backtalk. In this episode, either he's learned a lot in the interim, or he's simply written better, because he shuts McCoy up at first by asking for suggestions and then masterfully shuts down both McCoy and Scotty with his whispered suggestion that they mutiny. It's priceless, and to me the episode is worth it for that. But then, I've always been crazy about Spock. :-)

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  2. Every time Kirk is kidnapped from the ship, McCoy viciously attacks Spock as if it is all his fault. His racism is horrible and indicates that in another time he would be throwing the N word around with abandon. It needs to be addressed by the captain. McCoy shouldn't be allowed to get away with it. Mr. Spock puts up with a lot of crap from humans.

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